In 1973, The Exoricst made 232.9 Million dollars. in the 44 years since, no other horror movie has made more. The Exorcist has held the record for highest grossing horror movie of all time for 44 years!!!! Now, finally, a new movie has emerged that will not only top the Exorcist, its going to blow by with ease. It indeed is a matter of "when" not "if" IT will become the highest grossing horror movie of all time. Since we know were are going to be witnessing a historical box office run, I thought it'd be fun to follow IT day by day as it works its way toward passing the Exorcist. We'll also look at other notable movies IT will pass every day. Again, it can not be stated enough how historical this box office run will be. Horror movies traditionally just dont make a lot of money. The demographic is too small. R rated horror movies usually make even less because they cut out teenagers, a large part of horror movie demographics. So for IT to be making as much as it is is something that is going to be unprecented to watch.
IT Monday 9/11 Box Office Total: 8.8 Million Dollars
Total Through Monday 9/11 (4 Days): 132.2 Million Dollars (100.7 Million Behind Exorcist)
Notable Movies IT Passed for all time money made on Monday 9/11: Silence of the Lambs, Honey I Shrunk the Kids, Transformers: The Last Knight, The Ring
All Time Box Office Rank: 415
Other Notable Accomplishments: 79.7% of all people who bought a movie ticket over the weekend bought their ticket to see IT. This is the 5th highest percentage of people seeing one movie in a weekend ever.
Top Ten All Time Horror Movies
1. The Exorcist: 232.9 Million
2. Get Out: 175.5 Million
3. What Lies Beneath: 155.5 Million
4. Gremlins: 153.1 Million
5. The Blair Witch Project: 140.6 Million
6. The Conjuring: 137.4 Million
7. IT: 132.2 Million
Tuesday, September 12, 2017
Monday, September 11, 2017
ITs 123 Million dollar opening weekend touted "One of the most incredible box office stories of all time."
Box Office Mojo has called IT's 123 million dollar opening weekend one of the top ten most incredible box office stories of all time. There is not enough adjectives in the world to describe the incredible nature of an R rated horror movie making 123 Million in 3 days. For reference, "Get Out" another R rated horror movie this year, was considered an astounding success when it made $43 million in its opening weekend. Just to put it in perspective, lets compare IT to other popular R rated horror movies and how much they made in their opening weekend.
Get Out:43 Million
The Conjuring: 41 Million
Freddy Vs Jason: 36 Million
Before IT, these were the top three R rated horror movie opening weekends. Combined they don't match what IT did.
Box Office Mojo says "In our January 1st predictions, we predicted IT to have a 37 million opening weekend and make $111 million overall. We thought we were being optimistic with that prediction. IT has completely defied logic for what an R rated horror movie can make. With several weeks yet until Halloween, the sky is the limit for what IT can make, 350 Million is very much within range, a number usually reserved for Marvel, Star Wars, and Pixar movies. Who would have thought at the beginning of the year that IT, an R rated horror movie, would make more money than Cars 3, Spiderman: Homecoming, Despicable Me 3, maybe even Guardians of the Galaxy 2 and Wonder Woman? When we look back years from now, ITs box office run will be as remarkable as classic Box office runs such as The Avengers, The Dark Knight, Jurassic Park, Star Wars, Jaws, and Titanic. We are witnessing history."
Get Out:43 Million
The Conjuring: 41 Million
Freddy Vs Jason: 36 Million
Before IT, these were the top three R rated horror movie opening weekends. Combined they don't match what IT did.
Box Office Mojo says "In our January 1st predictions, we predicted IT to have a 37 million opening weekend and make $111 million overall. We thought we were being optimistic with that prediction. IT has completely defied logic for what an R rated horror movie can make. With several weeks yet until Halloween, the sky is the limit for what IT can make, 350 Million is very much within range, a number usually reserved for Marvel, Star Wars, and Pixar movies. Who would have thought at the beginning of the year that IT, an R rated horror movie, would make more money than Cars 3, Spiderman: Homecoming, Despicable Me 3, maybe even Guardians of the Galaxy 2 and Wonder Woman? When we look back years from now, ITs box office run will be as remarkable as classic Box office runs such as The Avengers, The Dark Knight, Jurassic Park, Star Wars, Jaws, and Titanic. We are witnessing history."
Saturday, September 9, 2017
IT has ruined all other horror movies for me
I try not to be a prisoner of the moment. When you are on the high of just seeing a new movie its really easy to proclaim it your new favorite immediately, but I really like to sit and process what I saw and digest it before making such claims. IT was far and away my most anticipated movie ever. I just dont get that excited for new movies. Even movies I am really excited about, say one such as Spiderman: Homecoming, I dont count down the days until it comes out and get super excited as it comes closer. But IT was different. Ever since the first trailer dropped back in March I have been counting down the days. Ever since Mid August I rewatched the trailer 5-10 times a night, spent so much time on Youtube watching behind the scenes footage, and cast interviews and other things. I was jacked for this movie to say the least. There was no way it could live up to the hype I built up for it in my head. And somehow it did, dare I say it even exceeded my all too high expectations.
Before I get into what I thought about the movie, lets get into the phenomenon it is for the whole country right now. The success of this movie is completely unprecedented. IT made an astounding 51 million on its opening day. After just one day IT is already in the top ten highest grossing horror movies ever. 51 Million is a number for opening day usually reserved for Batman, Spiderman, Star Wars, and Pixar movies. Certainly not R rated horror movies. The average R rated horror movie makes about 5-6 million on its opening day. Again, IT made 51 Million. It had 16 showings on its opening day at the closest theater to my house. All 16 sold out. I kept track. This is like something weve never seen before. Truly, IT is only the second horror movie EVER to sell out theaters and destroy the box office like this. The first? The Exorcist. 44 years ago. Thats how long its been since weve seen something to this level for a horror movie. Its astounding. Update: IT is now projected to make $120 Million in its opening weekend. Spiderman Homecoming made $117 Million. An R rated horror movie is going to make more money in its opening weekend than a Spiderman movie, with Iron Man in it, released in the middle of summer, when the most people go to movies. To say this is groundbreaking would be an understatement.
Back to me. IT is a masterpiece. After having time to digest, there is no doubt this is one of my top ten favorite movies of all time. Probably top five, maybe top three. Why? First, they have incredible source material to work with. The story Stephen King came up with here is probably the greatest horror novel ever created. It's an incredible story, and so all they filmakers had to do was find a way to make it translate well to the big screen. And they did. As beloved as the 1990 version is to so many people, the simple fact is that overall it is pretty mediocre fare. This coming from somebody who loves it (I love many many horror movies that I can admit are mediocre from a quality standpoint.)Its so popular and iconic because Tim Curry is an incredible actor and completely carried the movie as Pennywise, but any scene without him is nothing special. Not to mention the source material is very neutered because its a made for TV movie so needed to be made for TV audiences.
For starters this movie has an R rating and it earns every bit of it. The opening scene where Georgie gets killed is graphic, disturbing, and even rattled me for a moment. Right off the bat they want you to know this isn't the cheesy 1990 version. The verbal exchange between Pennywise and Georgie lasts what seems like forever (Purposefully Im sure) as the tension ratchets up to an unbearable level. It's a scene I wont soon forget, a perfectly horrifying introduction too this version of Pennywise. But by no means is this movie all about the scares.
What I absolutely adored about this movie is the way it juggles so many different genres back and forth within its two hours. It shifts back and forth between comedy, horror, and emotionally poignant and touching scenes so often and so quickly it can be jarring, but just makes the movie all the better. One moment your doubled over in laughter and five seconds later the mood has shifted back to horror. Many movies are horror comedies (American Werewolf in London is a masterclass in horror comedy) but the comedy part of those movies always fall on the side of dark/black humor or over the top sight gags. IT employs straight up comedy, watching the kids banter back and forth might just be the highlight of the movie as a whole actually. It's hilarious and allows the movie to breathe rather than being a screamfest. Its safe to say the way this movie violently shifts back and forth from horror to comedy to lighthearted so many times is something we've never seen in a movie before, and may never see again.
Apart from the comedy and horror aspects, I touched upon the emotionally poignant part of this movie. The "losers club" completely steal the movie. Their incredible acting and the way they build up each of the characters with their own unique personalities and traits and mannerisms leads to something incredibly rare in horror movies: Characters you actually care about. IT is the rare horror movie where you hope with all your heart that no one dies, because you love the characters so damn much. I've heard many say that IT is more a coming of age movie than a horror movie and I completely agree. The movie is at its core about a group of outsiders who come together to defeat evil. Its a very relatable theme and once again these are traits that are just so rare in a horror movie and thats what makes it special.
In the end this movie will live in my heart as an all time favorite because of the tapestry of genres it weaves together to make a perfect whole. Its a movie about facing your fears and standing up for what you believe in. its a movie about friendship and sticking together through tough times. Its a movie that somehow perfectly pulls off being heartfelt, hilarious, and terrifying, sometimes all three within a span of five minutes. Because of that, IT is truly a movie like we've never seen before, and may never see again.
Before I get into what I thought about the movie, lets get into the phenomenon it is for the whole country right now. The success of this movie is completely unprecedented. IT made an astounding 51 million on its opening day. After just one day IT is already in the top ten highest grossing horror movies ever. 51 Million is a number for opening day usually reserved for Batman, Spiderman, Star Wars, and Pixar movies. Certainly not R rated horror movies. The average R rated horror movie makes about 5-6 million on its opening day. Again, IT made 51 Million. It had 16 showings on its opening day at the closest theater to my house. All 16 sold out. I kept track. This is like something weve never seen before. Truly, IT is only the second horror movie EVER to sell out theaters and destroy the box office like this. The first? The Exorcist. 44 years ago. Thats how long its been since weve seen something to this level for a horror movie. Its astounding. Update: IT is now projected to make $120 Million in its opening weekend. Spiderman Homecoming made $117 Million. An R rated horror movie is going to make more money in its opening weekend than a Spiderman movie, with Iron Man in it, released in the middle of summer, when the most people go to movies. To say this is groundbreaking would be an understatement.
Back to me. IT is a masterpiece. After having time to digest, there is no doubt this is one of my top ten favorite movies of all time. Probably top five, maybe top three. Why? First, they have incredible source material to work with. The story Stephen King came up with here is probably the greatest horror novel ever created. It's an incredible story, and so all they filmakers had to do was find a way to make it translate well to the big screen. And they did. As beloved as the 1990 version is to so many people, the simple fact is that overall it is pretty mediocre fare. This coming from somebody who loves it (I love many many horror movies that I can admit are mediocre from a quality standpoint.)Its so popular and iconic because Tim Curry is an incredible actor and completely carried the movie as Pennywise, but any scene without him is nothing special. Not to mention the source material is very neutered because its a made for TV movie so needed to be made for TV audiences.
For starters this movie has an R rating and it earns every bit of it. The opening scene where Georgie gets killed is graphic, disturbing, and even rattled me for a moment. Right off the bat they want you to know this isn't the cheesy 1990 version. The verbal exchange between Pennywise and Georgie lasts what seems like forever (Purposefully Im sure) as the tension ratchets up to an unbearable level. It's a scene I wont soon forget, a perfectly horrifying introduction too this version of Pennywise. But by no means is this movie all about the scares.
What I absolutely adored about this movie is the way it juggles so many different genres back and forth within its two hours. It shifts back and forth between comedy, horror, and emotionally poignant and touching scenes so often and so quickly it can be jarring, but just makes the movie all the better. One moment your doubled over in laughter and five seconds later the mood has shifted back to horror. Many movies are horror comedies (American Werewolf in London is a masterclass in horror comedy) but the comedy part of those movies always fall on the side of dark/black humor or over the top sight gags. IT employs straight up comedy, watching the kids banter back and forth might just be the highlight of the movie as a whole actually. It's hilarious and allows the movie to breathe rather than being a screamfest. Its safe to say the way this movie violently shifts back and forth from horror to comedy to lighthearted so many times is something we've never seen in a movie before, and may never see again.
Apart from the comedy and horror aspects, I touched upon the emotionally poignant part of this movie. The "losers club" completely steal the movie. Their incredible acting and the way they build up each of the characters with their own unique personalities and traits and mannerisms leads to something incredibly rare in horror movies: Characters you actually care about. IT is the rare horror movie where you hope with all your heart that no one dies, because you love the characters so damn much. I've heard many say that IT is more a coming of age movie than a horror movie and I completely agree. The movie is at its core about a group of outsiders who come together to defeat evil. Its a very relatable theme and once again these are traits that are just so rare in a horror movie and thats what makes it special.
In the end this movie will live in my heart as an all time favorite because of the tapestry of genres it weaves together to make a perfect whole. Its a movie about facing your fears and standing up for what you believe in. its a movie about friendship and sticking together through tough times. Its a movie that somehow perfectly pulls off being heartfelt, hilarious, and terrifying, sometimes all three within a span of five minutes. Because of that, IT is truly a movie like we've never seen before, and may never see again.
Friday, August 4, 2017
Ranking Summer Movies 2017
Having an entire summer off from work has allowed me to spend a lot of time within the confined air conditioned solace of a movie theatre taking in the newest hollywood blockbusters. All in all I took in 20 movies over the course of the past two months and I thought it would be fun to rank them all and rate them all on a four star scale as well. lets get to it. I am also including the rotten tomatoes score of each movie to see how my opinion lines up with others. Rotten tomatoes is a very popular website that uses a formula based on critics and general public reviews of movies to assign a movie a score on a 1-100 scale. Any movie with a rotten tomato score below 60 is considered a bad movie or "rotten" with the lower the number the worse the movie. 60-69 is considered average and 70 and above is considered a good movie or "fresh." An 80 or above is considered exceptionally good and 90 and above is considered great.
20. Baywatch (0.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score: 19 - This movie adaption of the famous comedy action show features Zac Efron and Dwayne Johnson. It was an awful year for comedies as we will see. After five straight summers with classic hilarious comedy movies (Hangover in 2010, Horrible Bosses 2011, 21 Jump Street 2012, This is the End 2013, and 22 Jump Street 2014) nothing good has come out comedy wise since. This movie clearly tried to rip off of the 21 jump street formula by combining action and comedy but failed spectacularly. It only earns half a star because Dwayne Johnson saved the movie from being completely unwatchable.
19. Power Rangers (1 Star) Rotten Tomato Score: 45- This movie really makes you appreciate how well done the superhero movies by Marvel and even DC are. Power Rangers tries to be a superhero movie in the same vein but lacks all the qualities that makes Marvel movies so good. The humans behind the heroes are not very likeable, the villain is hilariously generic, and the battle scenes are much lower quality. This movie also takes the "origin story" part of a movie to the extreme as we dont see them become Power Rangers for the first time until 90 minutes into the movie. Luckily I didn't have to pay to see this one.
18. Wish Upon (1 Star) Rotten Tomato Score: 18 - This movie tries so hard to be Final Destination yet it completely lacks the zany campiness that makes the Final Destination movies so much fun to watch. Instead this movie tries to play it straight and just be scary, and what ensues is a boring wholly predictable generic horror movie.
17. The House (1.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score: 18: Another failed comedy, this one with a promising premise and a solid cast, that failed to execute. When two parents (Will Farrell, Amy Poehler) realize they cant pay for their daughters college tuition, they create an illegal casino in their basement to make money. The first half hour is pretty funny and sets up a promising movie, then it falls apart and the laughs dwindle as the movie goes on.
16. The Mummy (1.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-15: The big disappointment of the summer. When I heard of Universal rebooting their classic monsters I was excited about the idea but this first installment fell completely flat on its face. I really wish they would have went straight horror with this but instead Universal decided to go more in the direction of an action movie, without any of the fun energy that made Brendan Frasers 1999 Mummy movie a good movie. Not only that but the forced humor that is wedged into the script sucks any momentum out of the movie. Humor is not Tom Cruises forte. There were some flashed of a good movie, anytime horror comes to the forefront the movie shines for a few moments, but it's never able to get any momentum going and in the end adds up to a flop.
15. 47 Meters Down (2 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-54: After the success of "The Shallows" last year we were graced with another shark attack movie this summer that is not as good as the Shallows. I'm not once that says a good scary movie needs to have a lot of blood and guts but when you see a shark movie you expect, well, shark attacks, and this movie comes woefully short with only one on screen death. On the positive side there is plenty of tension built up but you never get the feeling that it paid off and the ending leaves something to be desired. nonetheless, two stars does not mean it was a bad movie, just an average one.
14. Cars 3 (2 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-67 : Funny enough, the last Pixar movie I saw in theatres was the first Cars movie 11 years ago. Since then Pixar has released a lot of great movies, but this wasnt one of them. Truth is everyone knows Cars is by far the weakest Pixar franchise, including Pixar, but they keep trotting out movies for it because of the merchandise money they make when they do from 5-12 year old boys. This movie had an interesting idea that went nowhere at the end of the day, including a climax/resolution that has to go down as the most groan inducing and uninteresting of any pixar has ever done, especially when compared to the emotionally poignant and complex climaxes of classic Pixar. Still, the movie was visually beautiful, and there were a few great scenes that kept me at least moderately engaged throughout the movie.
13. Pirates of the Carribean-Dead Men Tell No Tales (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-29: This is the 5th PoTC movie, but I completely missed the last two and hadn't seen a Pirates movie in 11 years. I enjoyed this movie way more than I ever expected to. The first two Pirates movies are classics but ever since then the Franchise has trotted out medicore movies. Captain Jack Sparrow, one of the most iconic movie characters of my generation has outlived his welcome and is now annoying and actually to me one of the weaker characters in this movie. There is also a "twist" in this movie that is out outlandish it actually made me laugh rather than draw an emotional response like it was supposed to. Still, I remembered watching this movie why I loved the Pirates movies as a kid. Despite the glaring flaws, they are just pure fun to watch, and this one was no different. The action sequences were great and the villain was riveting to watch, by far the highlight of the film.
12. Despicable Me 3 (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-61: The 3rd Despicable Me three has a lot of flaws, but it has just enough going for it to make it an enjoyable enough watch. Many of the subplots went nowhere, and even the main plot was paper thin, but the villain was the highlight and saved the movie, and the movie moved along at a nice pace. Also the minions were really thrown on the back burner for this movie, at one point there's about 25 whole minutes where we don't see a single one. The rotten tomato score shows this movie just barely straddles the line of being an average movie, and I think I agree.
11. Captain Underpants: The Epic First Movie (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-85: In my middle school years Captain Underpants was just as much a Hollywood Staple as Harry Potter and Goosebumps. Still, when I found out a movie was coming, I groaned. It just doesnt seem like the type of book that would lend itself to making a good movie. I was wrong. Judging by its rotten tomato score, the average person liked it even better than I did, and I enjoyed it way more than I thought I would as well. Never in a million years did I think this would be better than Cars 3 or Despicable Me 3 but here we are. Definitely the surprise hit of the summer.
10. Beauty and the Beast (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-71: The old saying goes: If at first you don't succeed, try again. Disney flipped that to mean "If at first you do succeed, do it the exact same way again." Disney's live action remake of a classic is another one I ejoyed way more than I expected. Its basically a line for line remake of the animated tale with a few extra scenes thrown it that add nothing to the plot but are there to make it a little different. What made me enjoy it was the songs providing that touch of nostalgia of a childhood classic and the stunning visuals and special effects that I was not expecting. With this movie being a box office smash, expect more live action remakes of Disney classic in the future. There is already plans for a Lion King remake next summer.
9. Girls Trip (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-87: So the end of summer finally delivered on the comedy front. After the disasters that were Baywatch and The House Girls Trip came through with a very funny movie. The high Rotten Tomato score and rave reviews led me to believe this movie was way better than it actually ended up being though. there were certainly some hilarious moments, but not as funny as some made it out to be. The ending was very good though, and it was a breath of fresh air on the comedy front after so many misfires.
8. The Dark Tower (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-16: This movie is getting completely slammed by critics, as evidenced by its Rotten Tomato score, and Im not really sure why. Based off the Stephen King series, this movie is not without its problems, quite a few actually. The pacing is weird, there is a lot of mythology and confusing plot threads that are never fully explained and go nowhere, and at 95 minutes it does kind of fell rushed and sloppily put together. Yet this movie is still a hell of a lot better than many are giving it credit for. I thoroughly enjoyed it, flaws and all.
7. Wonder Woman (3 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-92: The suprise hit, nobody thought a Wonder Woman solo movie could work and it defied the odds and made more money then Spider-Man Homecoming and Guardians of the Galaxy 2. In fact, it made more money than any movie on this list except for Beauty and the Beast. It was definitely a strong movie, another I enjoyed way more than I expected. The first 1.5 hours are great but I felt it stumbled to the finish a little bit. Still another strong superhero movie in maybe the best year for superhero movies ever.
6. War for the Planet of the Apes (3 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-95: The ending to a trilogy where the first two movies were both amazing made this my second most anticipated movie of the summer. In that regard it let me down a little bit, but was still very good. The first two movies of this trilogy were better in my opinion, and considering this movie was supposed to be the culmination of what the last two movies did a superb job building up, it didn't perfectly stick the landing. Caeaser to me is one of the greatest movie characters over the past fifteen years and considering hes a CGI monkey thats a pretty extraordinary feat the writers pulled off. The emotional weight the movie carries lives up to whats its supposed to be, and the message the movie sends is not one that should be blown off or taken lightly. Even though I liked the first two better, its incredibly rare where you can say all three movies in a trilogy are very strong movies, and this trilogy can put itself in that rare category.
5. Baby Driver (3 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-94: This had been hyped as the surprise hit of the summer and it did not disappoint. It's not hard to see why so many people have fallen head over heels for this movie. Its basically a Fast and Furious movie except with complex characters, a coherent and well thought out plot, and one of the best soundtracks for a movie ever. I was so ready to put this thrilling, adrenaline rush movie in my top three, but then the ending fell a little flat for me. Still one of the best movies of the summer, pretty impressive for a movie I had never heard of until a week before it came out.
4. Dunkirk (3.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-92: This was a movie I had seen trailers for but had no intention on seeing, as war movies aren't really up my alley. Then the overhwelmingly positive reviews came in and I just had to see what the fuss was about. This movie is as intense and relentless a movie experience as you can find. It has you on the edge of your seat from start to finish, never letting up, and leaving you exhausted by the end of it. This movie has already been thrown around as a Best picture nominee and its not hard to see why, its a remarkable work of art rarely seen in movies these days. My negative is that this is a movie that shines on a big screen, as the goal is to make you feel like you are really there, but I am not sure how well it will hold up when viewed on a smaller TV screen. The fact that a movie this good is number four shows how incredible a year for summer movies this was.
3. Kong: Skull Island (3.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-76: Although 76 is still a good rotten tomato score, it suggests that I loved this movie way more than the average person, because I thought this movie was phenomenal. There was some nice comedic touches, incredible actions sequences, and Kong himself looked incredible on the big screen. Add to that an awesome soundtrack, a recurring theme for this years top five movies, and this movie had my heart. There's not much to talk about plot wise, its a classic monster movie, the plot is kinda thin and the characters one dimensional. This movie knows what it is, a monster movie, and it does that incredibly well. Walking out of this movie I though there was only one movie that could maybe top it this ummer, but there was a big surprise heading my way.
2. Spiderman: Homecoming (3.5 stars) Rotten Tomato Score-93: This was always going to be my favorite movie this summer, or so I thought. Spider-man is hands down my favorite superhero, Tom Holland fits the role perfect, another killer soundtrack, and now Spidey fits snugly into the MCU. The best MCU character Tony Stark even makes an appearance or two. How could this movie not be awesome? It lived up to my expectations, but it could not topple a movie that stole my heart this summer, a movie that totally shocked me with how much I loved it.
1. Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (4 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-81: This was the second movie I saw this summer after Kong. As late at 90 minutes into watching it I thought to myself "this is really good, but I still think I liked Kong better." Then the last 45 minutes of the movie happened. Some of the most incredible 45 minutes of cinema I ever witnessed in my life and I am not exaggerating. The way the last 45 minute mixed incredible action sequences while still sprinkling in some comedy throughout, then packs an emotional punch at the end is incredible. When trying to figure out why I love this movie so much I came to two real conclusions. 1. The Music: Adds an element to this movie you just dont see in movies these days. The music is almost like a character in itself, but the real reason this movie is a masterpiece to me is the character of Yondu. His character arc in this movie is perfect, from potential villain to the end where he sacrifices his life for his adopted son, redeeming his prior faults. He also has one of the single most incredible scenes in a superhero movie ever in this movie, the scene where he, groot, and raccoon break out of the ship killing everyone in their path with Yondus arrow set to an awesome song. Its badass in every sense of the word, my favorite scene in one of my favorite movies.
Overall this summer movie season was awesome. Those top 7 movies on this list are all "A" movies. Even 8-13 are movies I wouldnt mind watching again.
20. Baywatch (0.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score: 19 - This movie adaption of the famous comedy action show features Zac Efron and Dwayne Johnson. It was an awful year for comedies as we will see. After five straight summers with classic hilarious comedy movies (Hangover in 2010, Horrible Bosses 2011, 21 Jump Street 2012, This is the End 2013, and 22 Jump Street 2014) nothing good has come out comedy wise since. This movie clearly tried to rip off of the 21 jump street formula by combining action and comedy but failed spectacularly. It only earns half a star because Dwayne Johnson saved the movie from being completely unwatchable.
19. Power Rangers (1 Star) Rotten Tomato Score: 45- This movie really makes you appreciate how well done the superhero movies by Marvel and even DC are. Power Rangers tries to be a superhero movie in the same vein but lacks all the qualities that makes Marvel movies so good. The humans behind the heroes are not very likeable, the villain is hilariously generic, and the battle scenes are much lower quality. This movie also takes the "origin story" part of a movie to the extreme as we dont see them become Power Rangers for the first time until 90 minutes into the movie. Luckily I didn't have to pay to see this one.
18. Wish Upon (1 Star) Rotten Tomato Score: 18 - This movie tries so hard to be Final Destination yet it completely lacks the zany campiness that makes the Final Destination movies so much fun to watch. Instead this movie tries to play it straight and just be scary, and what ensues is a boring wholly predictable generic horror movie.
17. The House (1.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score: 18: Another failed comedy, this one with a promising premise and a solid cast, that failed to execute. When two parents (Will Farrell, Amy Poehler) realize they cant pay for their daughters college tuition, they create an illegal casino in their basement to make money. The first half hour is pretty funny and sets up a promising movie, then it falls apart and the laughs dwindle as the movie goes on.
16. The Mummy (1.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-15: The big disappointment of the summer. When I heard of Universal rebooting their classic monsters I was excited about the idea but this first installment fell completely flat on its face. I really wish they would have went straight horror with this but instead Universal decided to go more in the direction of an action movie, without any of the fun energy that made Brendan Frasers 1999 Mummy movie a good movie. Not only that but the forced humor that is wedged into the script sucks any momentum out of the movie. Humor is not Tom Cruises forte. There were some flashed of a good movie, anytime horror comes to the forefront the movie shines for a few moments, but it's never able to get any momentum going and in the end adds up to a flop.
15. 47 Meters Down (2 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-54: After the success of "The Shallows" last year we were graced with another shark attack movie this summer that is not as good as the Shallows. I'm not once that says a good scary movie needs to have a lot of blood and guts but when you see a shark movie you expect, well, shark attacks, and this movie comes woefully short with only one on screen death. On the positive side there is plenty of tension built up but you never get the feeling that it paid off and the ending leaves something to be desired. nonetheless, two stars does not mean it was a bad movie, just an average one.
14. Cars 3 (2 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-67 : Funny enough, the last Pixar movie I saw in theatres was the first Cars movie 11 years ago. Since then Pixar has released a lot of great movies, but this wasnt one of them. Truth is everyone knows Cars is by far the weakest Pixar franchise, including Pixar, but they keep trotting out movies for it because of the merchandise money they make when they do from 5-12 year old boys. This movie had an interesting idea that went nowhere at the end of the day, including a climax/resolution that has to go down as the most groan inducing and uninteresting of any pixar has ever done, especially when compared to the emotionally poignant and complex climaxes of classic Pixar. Still, the movie was visually beautiful, and there were a few great scenes that kept me at least moderately engaged throughout the movie.
13. Pirates of the Carribean-Dead Men Tell No Tales (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-29: This is the 5th PoTC movie, but I completely missed the last two and hadn't seen a Pirates movie in 11 years. I enjoyed this movie way more than I ever expected to. The first two Pirates movies are classics but ever since then the Franchise has trotted out medicore movies. Captain Jack Sparrow, one of the most iconic movie characters of my generation has outlived his welcome and is now annoying and actually to me one of the weaker characters in this movie. There is also a "twist" in this movie that is out outlandish it actually made me laugh rather than draw an emotional response like it was supposed to. Still, I remembered watching this movie why I loved the Pirates movies as a kid. Despite the glaring flaws, they are just pure fun to watch, and this one was no different. The action sequences were great and the villain was riveting to watch, by far the highlight of the film.
12. Despicable Me 3 (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-61: The 3rd Despicable Me three has a lot of flaws, but it has just enough going for it to make it an enjoyable enough watch. Many of the subplots went nowhere, and even the main plot was paper thin, but the villain was the highlight and saved the movie, and the movie moved along at a nice pace. Also the minions were really thrown on the back burner for this movie, at one point there's about 25 whole minutes where we don't see a single one. The rotten tomato score shows this movie just barely straddles the line of being an average movie, and I think I agree.
11. Captain Underpants: The Epic First Movie (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-85: In my middle school years Captain Underpants was just as much a Hollywood Staple as Harry Potter and Goosebumps. Still, when I found out a movie was coming, I groaned. It just doesnt seem like the type of book that would lend itself to making a good movie. I was wrong. Judging by its rotten tomato score, the average person liked it even better than I did, and I enjoyed it way more than I thought I would as well. Never in a million years did I think this would be better than Cars 3 or Despicable Me 3 but here we are. Definitely the surprise hit of the summer.
10. Beauty and the Beast (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-71: The old saying goes: If at first you don't succeed, try again. Disney flipped that to mean "If at first you do succeed, do it the exact same way again." Disney's live action remake of a classic is another one I ejoyed way more than I expected. Its basically a line for line remake of the animated tale with a few extra scenes thrown it that add nothing to the plot but are there to make it a little different. What made me enjoy it was the songs providing that touch of nostalgia of a childhood classic and the stunning visuals and special effects that I was not expecting. With this movie being a box office smash, expect more live action remakes of Disney classic in the future. There is already plans for a Lion King remake next summer.
9. Girls Trip (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-87: So the end of summer finally delivered on the comedy front. After the disasters that were Baywatch and The House Girls Trip came through with a very funny movie. The high Rotten Tomato score and rave reviews led me to believe this movie was way better than it actually ended up being though. there were certainly some hilarious moments, but not as funny as some made it out to be. The ending was very good though, and it was a breath of fresh air on the comedy front after so many misfires.
8. The Dark Tower (2.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-16: This movie is getting completely slammed by critics, as evidenced by its Rotten Tomato score, and Im not really sure why. Based off the Stephen King series, this movie is not without its problems, quite a few actually. The pacing is weird, there is a lot of mythology and confusing plot threads that are never fully explained and go nowhere, and at 95 minutes it does kind of fell rushed and sloppily put together. Yet this movie is still a hell of a lot better than many are giving it credit for. I thoroughly enjoyed it, flaws and all.
7. Wonder Woman (3 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-92: The suprise hit, nobody thought a Wonder Woman solo movie could work and it defied the odds and made more money then Spider-Man Homecoming and Guardians of the Galaxy 2. In fact, it made more money than any movie on this list except for Beauty and the Beast. It was definitely a strong movie, another I enjoyed way more than I expected. The first 1.5 hours are great but I felt it stumbled to the finish a little bit. Still another strong superhero movie in maybe the best year for superhero movies ever.
6. War for the Planet of the Apes (3 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-95: The ending to a trilogy where the first two movies were both amazing made this my second most anticipated movie of the summer. In that regard it let me down a little bit, but was still very good. The first two movies of this trilogy were better in my opinion, and considering this movie was supposed to be the culmination of what the last two movies did a superb job building up, it didn't perfectly stick the landing. Caeaser to me is one of the greatest movie characters over the past fifteen years and considering hes a CGI monkey thats a pretty extraordinary feat the writers pulled off. The emotional weight the movie carries lives up to whats its supposed to be, and the message the movie sends is not one that should be blown off or taken lightly. Even though I liked the first two better, its incredibly rare where you can say all three movies in a trilogy are very strong movies, and this trilogy can put itself in that rare category.
5. Baby Driver (3 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-94: This had been hyped as the surprise hit of the summer and it did not disappoint. It's not hard to see why so many people have fallen head over heels for this movie. Its basically a Fast and Furious movie except with complex characters, a coherent and well thought out plot, and one of the best soundtracks for a movie ever. I was so ready to put this thrilling, adrenaline rush movie in my top three, but then the ending fell a little flat for me. Still one of the best movies of the summer, pretty impressive for a movie I had never heard of until a week before it came out.
4. Dunkirk (3.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-92: This was a movie I had seen trailers for but had no intention on seeing, as war movies aren't really up my alley. Then the overhwelmingly positive reviews came in and I just had to see what the fuss was about. This movie is as intense and relentless a movie experience as you can find. It has you on the edge of your seat from start to finish, never letting up, and leaving you exhausted by the end of it. This movie has already been thrown around as a Best picture nominee and its not hard to see why, its a remarkable work of art rarely seen in movies these days. My negative is that this is a movie that shines on a big screen, as the goal is to make you feel like you are really there, but I am not sure how well it will hold up when viewed on a smaller TV screen. The fact that a movie this good is number four shows how incredible a year for summer movies this was.
3. Kong: Skull Island (3.5 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-76: Although 76 is still a good rotten tomato score, it suggests that I loved this movie way more than the average person, because I thought this movie was phenomenal. There was some nice comedic touches, incredible actions sequences, and Kong himself looked incredible on the big screen. Add to that an awesome soundtrack, a recurring theme for this years top five movies, and this movie had my heart. There's not much to talk about plot wise, its a classic monster movie, the plot is kinda thin and the characters one dimensional. This movie knows what it is, a monster movie, and it does that incredibly well. Walking out of this movie I though there was only one movie that could maybe top it this ummer, but there was a big surprise heading my way.
2. Spiderman: Homecoming (3.5 stars) Rotten Tomato Score-93: This was always going to be my favorite movie this summer, or so I thought. Spider-man is hands down my favorite superhero, Tom Holland fits the role perfect, another killer soundtrack, and now Spidey fits snugly into the MCU. The best MCU character Tony Stark even makes an appearance or two. How could this movie not be awesome? It lived up to my expectations, but it could not topple a movie that stole my heart this summer, a movie that totally shocked me with how much I loved it.
1. Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (4 Stars) Rotten Tomato Score-81: This was the second movie I saw this summer after Kong. As late at 90 minutes into watching it I thought to myself "this is really good, but I still think I liked Kong better." Then the last 45 minutes of the movie happened. Some of the most incredible 45 minutes of cinema I ever witnessed in my life and I am not exaggerating. The way the last 45 minute mixed incredible action sequences while still sprinkling in some comedy throughout, then packs an emotional punch at the end is incredible. When trying to figure out why I love this movie so much I came to two real conclusions. 1. The Music: Adds an element to this movie you just dont see in movies these days. The music is almost like a character in itself, but the real reason this movie is a masterpiece to me is the character of Yondu. His character arc in this movie is perfect, from potential villain to the end where he sacrifices his life for his adopted son, redeeming his prior faults. He also has one of the single most incredible scenes in a superhero movie ever in this movie, the scene where he, groot, and raccoon break out of the ship killing everyone in their path with Yondus arrow set to an awesome song. Its badass in every sense of the word, my favorite scene in one of my favorite movies.
Overall this summer movie season was awesome. Those top 7 movies on this list are all "A" movies. Even 8-13 are movies I wouldnt mind watching again.
Monday, May 29, 2017
Memorial Day HHN Rumors
Memorial Day weekend is traditionally the time when HHN construction shifts into full gear and we fully can start to separate between what rumors are just rumors and what rumors are actually factual. This year is no different as facades on the tent houses are already visible and the last ten days has seen the rumor mill ramp up tremendously. In fact at this point we have a pretty general idea of what the 9 HHN houses will be this year. Lets take a look one through nine, in order of how likely it is to actually being a house this year.
1. American Horror Story: A Second year of American Horror Story has already been officially announced, with this years house covering the Asylum. Coven, and Roanoke seasons.
Liklelihood: 10/10
Excitement: 8/10 The first AHS house was awesome and all three of the seasons this years house will cover had some great material for a house. Coven was a weak season but still has some moments that could make for some great scenes in a house. Definitely looking forward to year 2 of AHS at HHN
2. The Shining: Another slam dunk since it has already been officially announced. The Shining has been one of those movies that has been rumored for years and years to be coming eventually and the time has finally come.
Likelihood: 10/10
Excitement: 8/10. I personally find the movie slightly overrated. Its not in my top twenty favorite horror movies and It wasnt one of those movies I was dying to see an HHN house for but the reason this gets an 8/10 on the excitement scale is because early word from those who have gotten the chance to see this house already say that this has the potential to be one of the best house ever. That has my attention.
3. Catacombs/Gothic Mashup: This rumored house combines two of the most popular houses in HHN history. Catacombs was a house in 2010 and if you've followed me for awhile you know this is my favorite HHN house EVER! Gothic was a 2012 house and while many consider it one of the best HHN house ever as well I find it was a little overrated, though still a very good house. It goes without saying that giving my favorite HHN house ever a sequel has my excitement level piqued, I have been wanting this for 7 years. This house though unannouced appears to be a slam dunk as all inside sources say its happening, and the facade is already visible outside of tent 1.
Likelihood: 9/10
Excitement: 10/10
4. Scarecrow: All inside sources also say a house with a scarecrow theme is coming this year, though it is unknown which route the house would take. Some sources say a straight up scary scarecrow house taking place in the dust bowl is one possibility. Another possibility is a 3-D demented Wizard of Oz house similar to the Asylum in Wonderland house from two years ago. I'm really hoping for the first option, but option two seems intriguing too.
Likelihood: 9/10
Excitement: 9/10 if option A, 7/10 if Option B
5. Ash Vs Evil Dead: The original Evil Dead movie is one of the most popular and also one of my all time favorite horror movies and the remake which came out in 2013 is probably the best horror remake there is, and now there is a TV Show featuring Bruce Campbell, the same actor that played Ash in the original Evil Dead thirty years ago reprising his role. Its unclear if this house would be based simply on the TV Show or also include elements from the original movie. What is clear is this house wont be based on the 2013 remake because a house was already made for that in 2013, and it was my 2nd favrotie house that year and of of my top 10 favorite ever. No matter what comes of this house I couldnt be more excited for a return to the Evil Dead universe to HHN.
Likelihood: 9/10
Excitement: 10/10
6. SAW: Saw is probably the most popular and well known horror franchise of the 2000's and with an 8th installment set to be released this October it only makes sense to bring a house for it to HHN. There was a Saw house in 2009, one year before I started going to HHN and I was devastated that I just missed out on that house. I dont love the Saw franchise as much now as I did seven years ago, my taste for it has kind of waned, but I am still pretty damn excited to see this franchise brought to life for me to walk through.
Likelihhood: 9/10
Excitement: 10/10
7. Dark Shadows (Icon House): Signs point to an icon house coming with the name of Dark Shadows. And who could our icon be? Cindy Caine!!!!!! Cindy Caine is well known among HHN fans as the "lost icon." All the way back in 2002 Cindy was set to be the icon for HHN, but a string of Child Abductions that summer led to execs believing making the icon a child was a bad idea, so the icon focus shifted to her father The Caretaker instead and Cindy never got her turn in the spotlight, but the character remained popular among HHN fans. 8 years later for the 20th anniversary Cindy finally got her own house, but still no icon status. Now it seems 15 years after her conception, Cindy Caine will finally get her time to shine. If the rumors of Cindy finally becoming an icon are true the HHN die hards will have a field day, including me.
Likelihood: 8/10
Excitement: 10/10
8. Insidious: Now we get to the ones that are a little less likely and also dont have my excitement level up a whole lot. Many insiders are saying Insidious is indeed happening, even though its only been two years since the last Insidious house. a 4th Insidious movie is coming but the 3rd one flopped so the franchise seems to be losing steam, and even though the last Insidious house was good Im not excactly dying for another one.
Likelihood: 7/10
Excitement: 6/10
9. The Conjuring: Here we have a Scream situation from two years ago. Insiders are saying a Conjuring house is already built and ready to go but legal issues with the movie may prevent it from going forward as a house this year. Luckily Universal has a backup plan though what the backup plan is is different depending on which inside source you talk to. Some say an original idea (yes please) Some say old reliable the Walking Dead (GOD NO!!!) Just when we thought the Walking Dead at HHN was indeed dead it could come roaring in at the last second. If we end up with the Conjuring it'd obviously be a better choice than the Walking Dead but I find the movie overrated and also too similar to Insiduous for both of them to have a house in the same year.
Likelihood: 5/10
Excitement: 6/10 if Conjuring, 1/10 if Walking Dead, 10/10 if original house.
1. American Horror Story: A Second year of American Horror Story has already been officially announced, with this years house covering the Asylum. Coven, and Roanoke seasons.
Liklelihood: 10/10
Excitement: 8/10 The first AHS house was awesome and all three of the seasons this years house will cover had some great material for a house. Coven was a weak season but still has some moments that could make for some great scenes in a house. Definitely looking forward to year 2 of AHS at HHN
2. The Shining: Another slam dunk since it has already been officially announced. The Shining has been one of those movies that has been rumored for years and years to be coming eventually and the time has finally come.
Likelihood: 10/10
Excitement: 8/10. I personally find the movie slightly overrated. Its not in my top twenty favorite horror movies and It wasnt one of those movies I was dying to see an HHN house for but the reason this gets an 8/10 on the excitement scale is because early word from those who have gotten the chance to see this house already say that this has the potential to be one of the best house ever. That has my attention.
3. Catacombs/Gothic Mashup: This rumored house combines two of the most popular houses in HHN history. Catacombs was a house in 2010 and if you've followed me for awhile you know this is my favorite HHN house EVER! Gothic was a 2012 house and while many consider it one of the best HHN house ever as well I find it was a little overrated, though still a very good house. It goes without saying that giving my favorite HHN house ever a sequel has my excitement level piqued, I have been wanting this for 7 years. This house though unannouced appears to be a slam dunk as all inside sources say its happening, and the facade is already visible outside of tent 1.
Likelihood: 9/10
Excitement: 10/10
4. Scarecrow: All inside sources also say a house with a scarecrow theme is coming this year, though it is unknown which route the house would take. Some sources say a straight up scary scarecrow house taking place in the dust bowl is one possibility. Another possibility is a 3-D demented Wizard of Oz house similar to the Asylum in Wonderland house from two years ago. I'm really hoping for the first option, but option two seems intriguing too.
Likelihood: 9/10
Excitement: 9/10 if option A, 7/10 if Option B
5. Ash Vs Evil Dead: The original Evil Dead movie is one of the most popular and also one of my all time favorite horror movies and the remake which came out in 2013 is probably the best horror remake there is, and now there is a TV Show featuring Bruce Campbell, the same actor that played Ash in the original Evil Dead thirty years ago reprising his role. Its unclear if this house would be based simply on the TV Show or also include elements from the original movie. What is clear is this house wont be based on the 2013 remake because a house was already made for that in 2013, and it was my 2nd favrotie house that year and of of my top 10 favorite ever. No matter what comes of this house I couldnt be more excited for a return to the Evil Dead universe to HHN.
Likelihood: 9/10
Excitement: 10/10
6. SAW: Saw is probably the most popular and well known horror franchise of the 2000's and with an 8th installment set to be released this October it only makes sense to bring a house for it to HHN. There was a Saw house in 2009, one year before I started going to HHN and I was devastated that I just missed out on that house. I dont love the Saw franchise as much now as I did seven years ago, my taste for it has kind of waned, but I am still pretty damn excited to see this franchise brought to life for me to walk through.
Likelihhood: 9/10
Excitement: 10/10
7. Dark Shadows (Icon House): Signs point to an icon house coming with the name of Dark Shadows. And who could our icon be? Cindy Caine!!!!!! Cindy Caine is well known among HHN fans as the "lost icon." All the way back in 2002 Cindy was set to be the icon for HHN, but a string of Child Abductions that summer led to execs believing making the icon a child was a bad idea, so the icon focus shifted to her father The Caretaker instead and Cindy never got her turn in the spotlight, but the character remained popular among HHN fans. 8 years later for the 20th anniversary Cindy finally got her own house, but still no icon status. Now it seems 15 years after her conception, Cindy Caine will finally get her time to shine. If the rumors of Cindy finally becoming an icon are true the HHN die hards will have a field day, including me.
Likelihood: 8/10
Excitement: 10/10
8. Insidious: Now we get to the ones that are a little less likely and also dont have my excitement level up a whole lot. Many insiders are saying Insidious is indeed happening, even though its only been two years since the last Insidious house. a 4th Insidious movie is coming but the 3rd one flopped so the franchise seems to be losing steam, and even though the last Insidious house was good Im not excactly dying for another one.
Likelihood: 7/10
Excitement: 6/10
9. The Conjuring: Here we have a Scream situation from two years ago. Insiders are saying a Conjuring house is already built and ready to go but legal issues with the movie may prevent it from going forward as a house this year. Luckily Universal has a backup plan though what the backup plan is is different depending on which inside source you talk to. Some say an original idea (yes please) Some say old reliable the Walking Dead (GOD NO!!!) Just when we thought the Walking Dead at HHN was indeed dead it could come roaring in at the last second. If we end up with the Conjuring it'd obviously be a better choice than the Walking Dead but I find the movie overrated and also too similar to Insiduous for both of them to have a house in the same year.
Likelihood: 5/10
Excitement: 6/10 if Conjuring, 1/10 if Walking Dead, 10/10 if original house.
Thursday, January 12, 2017
Power Ranking Lenny and Larry cookie flavors
A few months ago I stumbled across Lenny and larrys complete cookies. They have become popular the past couple years and the idea of a vegan, all natural, healthy cookie intrigued me. These are massive sized cookies that are billed as healthy, they can't possibly taste any good can they? Wrong! these are delicious and in fact I havent even bothered having another type of cookie since my first encounter with Lenny and Larry and over the past four months have probably had 3-4 of these things a week. Lenny and Larry boast eleven different flavored cookies and like with anything some stand out as much better than others, so I decided to rank all their flavors from gross to most delicious. Here we go
11. Coconut Chocolate Chip: Honesty time, I have not tried this flavor. There's no point. There are two flavors in this world I find completely repulsive: Pineapple and Coconut. Even if I would have tried this flavor there is no doubt it would have been dead last and I wouldn't have been able to finish it. Moving on.
10. White Chocolate Macadamia: We move on from the only flavor I didn't bother to try to the only flavor where I couldn't finish a whole cookie. I have had white chocolate macadamia cookies before that I really liked so I had high hopes but they were shattered. What I got was a bland and pretty gross base cookie flavor with way too many macadamia nuts and not nearly enough white chocolate pieces. The disproportion made me stop trying to eat this one after about half a cookie. This is the only flavor I'll never have again.
9. Lemon Poppy Seed: If this was simply a lemon flavor it may have bumped up a couple slots but the inclusion of poppy seeds added a texture that I didn't find all that appealing. This tiny seeds keep getting stuck in your teeth and make it less enjoyable to eat the cookie. The lemon flavor itself was fine enough, though a little too muted for my taste, I would have preferred it a little stronger. Still a flavor I wouldnt go out of my way to eat again, but I wouldnt be opposed to the though either.
8. Birthday Cake: I quite enjoy birthday cake flavored things so again had high expectations that were somewhat let down. The confetti adds a nice texture that I really enjoyed but the cake flavor starts to vaguely remind you of those days as a toddler eating playodh after awhile. Still an enjoyable enough flavor.
7. Oatmeal Raisin: I am not the biggest fan of oatmel raisin cookies so this one was up against the wall from the start but in the end was probably the best oatmeal raisin cookie I have ever had, though I haven't had many. The base flavor of the cookie was really good and the proportion of oats and raisins was perfect and added nice texture and flavor.
6. Chocolate Chip: The classic cookie flavor that ranks way lower than I would have thought going in. This is the one that suffered from being a healthy cookie. Unlike the other flavors I have had a ton of different chocolate chip cookies in my lifetime and this version just wasnt up to par with the others. This is the only flavor where I could really tell i was eating a healthy cookie with different ingredients. Still not a bad flavor.
5. Pumpkin: Now we're getting to the really good stuff. The first couple times I had this flavor I thought it was pretty decent, but probably would have ranked it seventh on this list. Then one time I decided to microwave it for ten seconds, and it made this flavor so much better. Warm is the way to go for this one as it really brings out the spices and makes the flavor explode. Lenny and Larry did a good job at nailing this classic fall flavor.
4. Double Chocolate Peanut Butter Swirl: This flavor combines two flavors that will be seen later in this list (spoiler alert.) You would think combining two of my three favorite flavors into flavor would be even better combined right? Thats what I was expecting too but sadly after trying it these flavor are better separate. Its still a really good cookie though, as evidenced by its selection at number four.
3. Peanut Butter: Now we are getting to the absolute heavenly flavors. This is another flavor that shines when microwaved for a few second. The peanut butter flavor is so much more authentic than any other peanut butter cookie I've ever had, and the baked in peanuts into the cookie make this flavor a slam dunk top three.
2. Double Chocolate: Every flavor up until this point was super easy to rank. But then I got to the top two and I honestly couldnt decide which one was number one and which one was number two. Honestly consisder this 1A, because I have a hard time saying this incredible flavor isnt the best. I am usually not a huge fan of chocolate cookies but the rich moist flavor in this one is so good. Bonus points for being a great pairing with mountain dew.
1. Snickerdoodle: There are few things better in life to me than a good snickerdoodle cookie, and this is the best one Ive ever had. First of all, the amount of cinnamon caked on top of this thing is obscene. I can never eat this one without my hands being covered in cinnamon by the end. The texture and doughy taste is perfect for a cookie of this flavor. This flavor also pairs perfectly with an Orange Mountain dew kickstart. With this one (and Double Chocolate) Lenny and Larry have created cookie perfection.
11. Coconut Chocolate Chip: Honesty time, I have not tried this flavor. There's no point. There are two flavors in this world I find completely repulsive: Pineapple and Coconut. Even if I would have tried this flavor there is no doubt it would have been dead last and I wouldn't have been able to finish it. Moving on.
10. White Chocolate Macadamia: We move on from the only flavor I didn't bother to try to the only flavor where I couldn't finish a whole cookie. I have had white chocolate macadamia cookies before that I really liked so I had high hopes but they were shattered. What I got was a bland and pretty gross base cookie flavor with way too many macadamia nuts and not nearly enough white chocolate pieces. The disproportion made me stop trying to eat this one after about half a cookie. This is the only flavor I'll never have again.
9. Lemon Poppy Seed: If this was simply a lemon flavor it may have bumped up a couple slots but the inclusion of poppy seeds added a texture that I didn't find all that appealing. This tiny seeds keep getting stuck in your teeth and make it less enjoyable to eat the cookie. The lemon flavor itself was fine enough, though a little too muted for my taste, I would have preferred it a little stronger. Still a flavor I wouldnt go out of my way to eat again, but I wouldnt be opposed to the though either.
8. Birthday Cake: I quite enjoy birthday cake flavored things so again had high expectations that were somewhat let down. The confetti adds a nice texture that I really enjoyed but the cake flavor starts to vaguely remind you of those days as a toddler eating playodh after awhile. Still an enjoyable enough flavor.
7. Oatmeal Raisin: I am not the biggest fan of oatmel raisin cookies so this one was up against the wall from the start but in the end was probably the best oatmeal raisin cookie I have ever had, though I haven't had many. The base flavor of the cookie was really good and the proportion of oats and raisins was perfect and added nice texture and flavor.
6. Chocolate Chip: The classic cookie flavor that ranks way lower than I would have thought going in. This is the one that suffered from being a healthy cookie. Unlike the other flavors I have had a ton of different chocolate chip cookies in my lifetime and this version just wasnt up to par with the others. This is the only flavor where I could really tell i was eating a healthy cookie with different ingredients. Still not a bad flavor.
5. Pumpkin: Now we're getting to the really good stuff. The first couple times I had this flavor I thought it was pretty decent, but probably would have ranked it seventh on this list. Then one time I decided to microwave it for ten seconds, and it made this flavor so much better. Warm is the way to go for this one as it really brings out the spices and makes the flavor explode. Lenny and Larry did a good job at nailing this classic fall flavor.
4. Double Chocolate Peanut Butter Swirl: This flavor combines two flavors that will be seen later in this list (spoiler alert.) You would think combining two of my three favorite flavors into flavor would be even better combined right? Thats what I was expecting too but sadly after trying it these flavor are better separate. Its still a really good cookie though, as evidenced by its selection at number four.
3. Peanut Butter: Now we are getting to the absolute heavenly flavors. This is another flavor that shines when microwaved for a few second. The peanut butter flavor is so much more authentic than any other peanut butter cookie I've ever had, and the baked in peanuts into the cookie make this flavor a slam dunk top three.
2. Double Chocolate: Every flavor up until this point was super easy to rank. But then I got to the top two and I honestly couldnt decide which one was number one and which one was number two. Honestly consisder this 1A, because I have a hard time saying this incredible flavor isnt the best. I am usually not a huge fan of chocolate cookies but the rich moist flavor in this one is so good. Bonus points for being a great pairing with mountain dew.
1. Snickerdoodle: There are few things better in life to me than a good snickerdoodle cookie, and this is the best one Ive ever had. First of all, the amount of cinnamon caked on top of this thing is obscene. I can never eat this one without my hands being covered in cinnamon by the end. The texture and doughy taste is perfect for a cookie of this flavor. This flavor also pairs perfectly with an Orange Mountain dew kickstart. With this one (and Double Chocolate) Lenny and Larry have created cookie perfection.
Saturday, November 5, 2016
Mom House Count
Krampus: 5
Exorcist: 4
H2: 5
TCM: 4
Tomb: 5
Ghost: 3
AHS: 1
Lunatics: 2
Walking Dead: 1
H2: 5
TCM: 4
Tomb: 5
Ghost: 3
AHS: 1
Lunatics: 2
Walking Dead: 1
Bill and Ted: 9
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